LOVE IN EXILE
Genesis 3:21- Unto Adam also and to his wife did the LORD God make coats of
skins, and clothed them. (KJV)
I have read this verse uncountable times but I never thought much of it. However
on the 8th of July, 15, I read this scripture and I experienced it in a new light. It hit
me like a sucker punch in the gut, “HE MADE COATS AND CLOTHED THEM!!!”
You may not understand my shock so let me explain.
The Bible tells us in Genesis 1:27 that we are created in the image and likeness of
God. It also tells us in Genesis 2 that he gave man dominion over HIS creation and
to name them as he pleased. Now this is enough proof that God gave man enough
wisdom to make him very capable of making his own clothes.
You would therefore agree with me that he could have easily exiled them after
cursing them and left them to their fate but He didn’t. Before He sent them away
for good. He clothed them and covered their shame, in spite of all that happened.
I can’t explain God but I believe this was His way of telling man, “I will always
love you and will never forsake you”. He must have been heartbroken watching
their backs as they left though He was the very one who sent them away.
This therefore begs the question, “Why send them away then?” Let’s then
attempt creating a continuation where God still tried to keep them close. They
would have eaten of the tree of life and would have become immortal beings like
their Creator. Eventually there will be a struggle for power because man will try
playing God and being God. God would then have no choice rather than to wipe
out the human race. All hopes of reconciliation will be lost. He sent them away so
someday the human race would be reconciled unto Him through Jesus Christ.
Before I sign off, let me try likening this to situations we face in our relationships
with fellow humans. Sometimes we find ourselves in relationships and it feels
like the harder we hold on and try with all our might, the worse things get. No
number of words or interventions seems to help the situation yet it’s so hard to
let go because you’re emotionally vested in it. Well, it maybe God’s way of telling
you to let go. That doesn’t mean you are giving up. I remember when I was much
younger, I would misbehave and my mum would discipline me. After she was
sure the message had sunk in and I had cried enough, she would do something
nice to show me that she still loved me. If she hadn’t done this, I don’t want to
imagine how things would have turned out.
Though not the same situation, it’s quite similar. The separation will feel like a
punishment because it’s going to hurt one or all involved real bad. Use that
period to seek God’s face and let him work out His purpose in your individual
lives and in the relationship. Once He is involved, things will work out for your
good. It maybe reconciliation or resolution but you would be smiling at the end
of it. If you’re dealing with a stubborn heart, He holds the hearts of kings like a
stream and He directs them as He wills. Trust him with this person’s heart and
He will handle it. He is a God of impossibilities.
WRITTEN BY LESLIE AFIA NTIRIWAA
So in one way or the other you meet someone of the opposite sex you really connect with and like,
possibly fall in love. Problem is you are miles apart even continents. How does this work? Is it even
possible? The answers you’re bound to get a good number of times are going to be negative, even from
fellow Christians. The next thing you know, you are torn apart, filled with doubt seeing the smallest
issue as a sign that it’s not meant to be. You barely even get the chance to build a solid and stable
friendship. All this because from the onset when you set out to ask for advice all you got most of the
time was people telling you why and how it can’t work not why and how it CAN work. You are handed
an abortion pill. This post is for those who are quick to condemn long distance relationships and rather
propose short distance relationships, especially my fellow Christians.
Why are we so quick to judge and condemn forgetting that:
Nothing is impossible with God: The Bible in more ways than one teaches us that with God
nothing is impossible. Consider Abraham and Sarah, even in their old age when they were both
well advanced in age and Sarah laughed at the idea of having “pleasure” let alone bearing a child
God said to her, “Is anything too hard for the Lord?” Why then do we allow the standards of the
world and human reasoning to define if this can work? Why not teach them to “Trust in the Lord
with all their hearts and lean not on their own understanding or yours.”? Why not teach them to
“Acknowledge Him in all their ways and He shall direct their paths.”? Why not teach them to
make God and purity the foundation of their relationships?
Nothing good comes easy: The Bible has made it quite clear that when it comes to loving and
being loved, it is no easy task. Love is meant to bear all things, believe all things and endure all
things. Yet we are so quick to dismiss a long distance relationship because it takes too much
work and is less fun. That could be what God plans for them but we go shattering it and sowing
doubt thereby destroying a possibly beautiful union.
There are important lessons to be learnt spiritually, emotionally, physically and psychologically:
For a long distance relationship to survive, you need to be learn to COMMUNICATE effectively,
persevere and make God an integral part of the relationship through constant prayer. You need
to find creative ways of making things work despite the distance. In the end, all these become
an integral part of you and your relationship and will serve you in ways you can imagine till
death do you part. Most importantly you learn to build a solid and stable friendship which would
serve you greatly when the storm hits and melts away the romance. You will still have your
friend. Why not teach them all this rather than handing them the abortion pill so quickly?
You value your relationship and the significant other even more: Having to be away constantly
from your significant other makes you value those times you get to spend together because you
know how crappy it feels to be away from them. In that case why not teach them and guide
them so they don’t fall into sexual sin when they meet physically. Why not teach them to
persevere in purity and find other ways of enjoying each other’s company in all purity?
That could be a model relationship for others to look up to and reignite their faith in Godly
I know usually our intentions are the best but don’t go planting the seed of doubt and then crown it with
Before I go any further, I’d like to get this out of the way. The only way this stands a chance is when the
2 people involved are God-fearing, Bible-believing, born-again Christians. Not the kind you inherited
from your parents simply because they gave birth to you and they are Christians.
I have had the opportunity of hearing what people think of long distance relationships. Most of the time,
these reasons border on personal experience and logical reasoning as a fellow human. Trust me, these
are tempting and make perfect sense to the human mind. However, I am a Christian, still growing and
learning and my faith in Christ and my way of thinking tells me otherwise. This doesn’t mean we should
go over spiritualizing things and saying “If God made us meet like this then it must be his plan” or
something like that. Lady, gentleman, you have a heart and His Holy Spirit. God gave them to you to
make use of. When you pray and you have no peace, advice yourself. This therefore, stresses the
importance of having God as the foundation of EVERY relationship, short or long distance. “… A
threefold cord is not easily broken” (Eccl 4:12).
WRITTEN BY LESLIE AFIA NTIRIWAA
Deliberate deeds… Deliberate deeds… Deliberate deeds… If only we will be deliberate in our deeds, what
a wonderful world this would be. You see, I believe in a number of truths. One of them was re-echoed
by David in Psalm 51:5. “Behold I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me”. This
tells me that since the fall of man in the Garden of Eden, evil has been weaved into the fibre of man.
Nonetheless, I still hold the hope that man is very capable of good. Why? Because we are created in the
image and likeness of a Good God. He is our perfection.
Let’s take into consideration the average human being. I like to believe that most of the time people
don’t wake up planning to make others life miserable in one way or the other. Even in the best and
highest of spirits, we are capable of hurting others. Why? Because we are instinctively selfish to an
extent, no matter how small. A person could wake up in a very good mood, step out and see someone
dressed in an awkward manner and they would instinctively laugh visibly or behind their backs. Maybe
that’s all the person could afford or that’s all they may actually have. Maybe, they don’t have the
fortune of being of sane mind like we do. It may or may not be their fault. But one will do the first thing
that comes to them without any thought. Laugh, snort, giggle, smirk, give a weird look or retort. I know I
This explains why we can easily hurt the people we claim we love. Sometimes we do it continuously
without taking the time to access the effect of our actions on friends and family. Sometimes we take the
sacrifices, gifts, etc. for granted and abuse them not because we want to but because that’s how we are.
We don’t take the time to consider how our actions translate to others and the possible consequences.
We just do it and damn the consequences.
Families are torn; hearts are broken; great friendships are destroyed all because “that’s how I am and
you’d have to accept me this way”. That’s the lousy excuse we always give, isn’t it? Well I’m very sorry
to break this to you. Nobody is under obligation to stick with you when you CHOOSE to play around in
the muck and splash filth on them. I don’t believe the Godhead would grant you His ever sufficient grace
when you are enjoying playing with the pigs. No way!!! Does He want you out? Yes. Would you enjoy
how He would drag you out? Hell no! Why? He would turn the mud into quick sand and you are going
to get sucked in unless you stretch out your hand to Him. So you either wait till this happens or you
heed His call now and “refuse to be conformed to this world (the flesh and its desires) but be
transformed through the renewal of your mind” (Rom. 12:2). Be rational! Be intentional!! Be
deliberate!!! Have faith that He can transform your mess into a message. He says in 2 Corinthians 12:9
that His grace is sufficient for you, for His strength is made perfect in your weakness. Acknowledge your
imperfections, surrender them to Him and walk in the same way He walked (1 John 2:6, 1 Corinthians 11 :1
WRITTEN BY LESLIE AFIA NTIRIWAA